gossip

You know what ‘gossip’ is – trivial chat, usually by women and usually a bit mean, about which celebs are sleeping together, the friend in your group that no one actually really likes (aw) or other people’s bad haircuts. (Also, an awesome indie rock band fronted by the legend that is Beth Ditto.)

But ‘gossip’ originally meant something completely different, and much nicer. It comes from an Old English word, ‘godsibb’, which referred to a godmother or godfather. ‘Godsibb’ was a compound (aka two words smushed together) of ‘god’ (you know what that means) and ‘sibb’, meaning a relative or friend, or kinship.

By the Middle English period (approximately the late 11th to late 15th century), changes in pronunciation meant that ‘godsibb’ had evolved into ‘gossib’. And its meaning had expanded to include close friends and companions, not just godparents. It was often used to describe women’s close and intimate friendships, especially those who supported one another during childbirth.

Later, the term became closely associated with women’s social interactions, and the personal and detailed conversations we have when gathered together to support each other. As these gatherings and conversations became more visible, ‘gossip’ began to be used more specifically to describe talk among women.

By the 16th century, ‘gossip’ had acquired the modern sense of idle or pointless talk or rumour-mongering, especially about other people’s personal or private affairs.

The way that ‘gossip’ morphed from something positive into something negative is called semantic derogation. This is a phenomenon where everyday words, usually related to women or female-associated things, become a pejorative (i.e. a word that expresses negative or disrespectful connotations). Other examples include:

• spinster: this simply meant a woman who spun thread for a living. But we now use it to describe an unmarried older woman who’s lonely and will be eaten by her many cats when she dies

• madam: this used to be a respectful term for a woman of authority. But now it’s mainly used to refer to women who run brothels

• mistress: this was also a term for a woman with control or authority. Now we use it to describe a woman involved with a married man

• diva: now used for women seen as ‘high maintenance’ or demanding, this used to just be a term for a kick-ass female opera singer

• biddy: an annoying or nosy elderly woman. According to ChatGPT, this once meant a young chicken. But according to me, it was originally a shortening of ‘Bridget’, a popular Irish girls’ name – see previous word of the week, ‘biddy’. Either way, it’s sexist

• crone: this originally just meant an old woman, but now has much more negative connotations of ugliness and nastiness.

GRRRR, patriarchy. Here’s some Beth Ditto being awesome to make us all feel better.

yonic

I expect you know what ‘phallic’ means. But you’ve probably never heard of ‘yonic’, which is basically the female equivalent* (shakes fist at patriarchy) – an adjective that describes objects or symbols that resemble or represent the female genitalia, particularly the vulva.

‘Yonic’ is derived from a Sanskrit word, ‘yoni’ (योनि), which means ‘womb’, ‘uterus’ or ‘vulva’, as well as ‘source’. In various Eastern religions and spiritual traditions, the yoni is revered as a symbol of divine feminine energy and fertility, and the origin of life. The concept of the yoni is often associated with the goddess Shakti in Hinduism, representing the creative and nurturing aspects of the universe. Yoni and linga (the masculine version) iconography is found in Shiva temples and archaeological sites across the Indian subcontinent and southeast Asia.

The yoni may well be the oldest spiritual icon not just in India but in many ancient cultures. It’s only here in the West that we’ve traditionally treated feminine sexual organs and sexuality as taboo – in Indic religions (i.e. Hinduism, Buddhism, Jainism and Sikhism) and other similar ancient cultures, the yoni has long been seen as as a deep philosophical and cosmic truth that represents feminine power and potential. It’s closely linked with the natural cycles of the moon, earth and life itself. Take that, patriarchy.

Roses are often considered a yonic symbol, which seems a bit odd to me as men often give them to women as a romantic gesture. Maybe they should be giving us more phallic flowers. Like the phallus impudicus, for example, AKA the common stinkhorn, a fungus renowned for being shaped like a penis and for having an absolutely horrible smell. Hmmm, maybe this is why I’m single…

*Which presumably gets paid 13% less than her male counterpart.

lullaby

You know what a lullaby is – a song you sing to a baby that won’t sleep (hello to my nephew). ‘Lullaby’ comes from the Middle English phrase ‘lullen’, which means ‘to lull’, and ‘by’ which means, well, ‘by’ or ‘near’. So it literally translates as ‘to lull near’. We’ve been using the word ‘lullaby’ in English since at least the 16th century.

So far, so straightforward. But, there’s another, more sinister explanation. Before I get into it, I should preface this by saying this is ‘folk etymology’ which is when we change or reinterpret the origin of a word over time, usually due to a popular or widely held (wrong) belief about its meaning (see ‘penthouse’ for an example). So everything after this point is probably bollocks. But let’s just go with it, because it’s much more interesting.

Lilith and snake pal (not the name of the painting) by John Collier

In this explanation, the word ‘lullaby’ comes from ‘Lilith abi’ which means ‘Lilith, begone’ in Hebrew. In some Jewish mythology, Lilith was the first wife of Adam, before Eve (PLOT TWIST). Unlike Eve, who was made from Adam’s rib, Lilith was created from the same clay as he was, which made them equal. Because of this she got a bit uppity – literally – and refused to lie underneath him when they were getting jiggy with it, or have his children. You go, girl.

Because of all this bloody feminism (I bet she wanted equal pay and dresses with pockets too), Lilith was either banished from the Garden of Eden or left of her own accord (I hope it was the second one). In the wilderness around the garden she became a demon who preyed on newborn infants and seduced men in their sleep (using reverse cowgirl, presumably – no missionary for our Lilith). She’s often shown as having wings, or as a snake.

Lilith appears in various Jewish texts, including the Talmud and the Zohar. And depending on who you talk to she’s either a symbol of female empowerment and resistance against the patriarchy, or a dangerous and evil woman who threatens the very order of creation. I think you can probably guess which side I come down on.

Anyway, back to lullabies. For whatever reason, Lilith has got a reputation for stealing babies. One belief is that this is because she was jealous of the attention Adam and Eve gave their children, while another says she could only have demon babies, so she stole human ones to make up for it. Either way, singing ‘Lilith abi’, or a lullaby, was a way to ward off Lilith and protect your babbie from her evil/feminist clutches.

I told you it was better than the real answer.